Don’t forget kids, this exemplar is one Starbucks too many from being Prime Minister.

Mark Choueke: How did you and your cabinet colleagues react to Peter Law’s decision to quit the party after 35 years service to Blaenau Gwent as a Labour politician?

John Prescott: It didn’t even register with us. The voters just have one choice, vote Labour otherwise they’ll end up with a Tory government. It’s unfortunate that some of our decisions upset some people.

MC: But this isn’t about upsetting Peter Law, it’s about upsetting the many thousands of Labour voters in Blaenau Gwent who helped you form a strong government ­ they feel alienated.

JP: Why are you asking me about this, I don’t care, it’s a Welsh situation, I’m a national politician.

MC: Are you too big to care about the Labour voters in Blaenau Gwent? Do you think there may be something in your party’s methods of working that require a rethink when a politician chooses to stand against you after 35 years service to Labour?

JP (walking away): Where do they get these amateurs from? You’re an amateur mate, go get on your bus, go home.

MC: Are you too big for the regional press now John?

JP: Bugger off - get on your bus you amateur.

MC (Following Deputy Prime Minister): Is my interview over John? Because if that’s all you’ve got to say, that’s what will go in the paper.

JP (turns aggressively back to reporter): Ooohh, I’m scared, go ahead, put it in your paper.

Labour candidate for Monmouth Huw Edwards: I could answer this question for you Mark…

MC: I hoped to hear what the deputy prime minister had to say about it.

JP (now ignoring reporter): I’ve never seen a school in such a lovely setting.

MC: Is that my interview over?