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Rochenko (or should I say Captain Swing?) over at Smokewriting has passed on the poisoned chalice of another meme. I’ve been invited to elucidate on my personal power fantasies.

If you could have one superpower, what would it be and why? (Assume you also get baseline superhero enhancements like moderately increased strength, endurance and agility.)
The ability to produce really good pork pies. Because I like pork pies and I’m hungry. Alright, purple pork pies. That can fly and stuff.

Which, if any, “existing” superhero(es) do you fancy, and why?
Jakita Wagner from Planetary seems a very personable young woman. She can dropkick a rhino. Apparently. Not that I look for that in a woman.

Which, if any, “existing” superhero(es) do you hate?
Probably Night Owl II from Watchmen. He was a whining get who could only get his winkie to stand up when dressed as a giant owl. And at the end of the book he thought a blonde mullet and moustache was a good disguise.

OK, here’s the tough one. What would your superhero name be? (No prefab porn-name formulas here, you have to make up the name you think you’d be proud to mask under.)
The Procrastinator, Thief of Time.

For extra credit: Is there an “existing” superhero with whom you identify/whom you would like to be?
The Brown Bottle. HADAWAY FRIGGAAAS!!!

Pass it on. Three people please, and why they’re the wind beneath your wings.
Jim Bliss, who I’m still in awe of for his understanding of Grant Morrison’s The Invisibles. Nick Barlow, founder of CRACCA. And Nosemonkey at Europhobia, just to shut him up about CAP and EU rebates for five minutes.