The End of the Peer Show
Take the pledge:
“I will purchase a Virtual Peerage but only if 10 other people will too.”
And unlike buying a real peerage, the money will be going to a good cause. Prices start at a very reasonable £7.50 for a Baronetcy. Baronet McKeating of Yoghurt. I’m having some of that.
You can buy the peerages here. Peasant.
Posted on March 15th, 2006 at 1:45 pm
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Filed under Activism, UK politics |
Ah, you’re showing your non-posh upbringing here, old man. It’d be Sir Justin of Yoghurt if you became a Baronet, old boy.
I dunno - no one knows the correct forms of address any more. No wonder this country’s gone to the dogs.
Perhaps a kindly reader could furnish our dear Mr McKeating with a copy of Debrett’s?
*wanders off to take out a subscription to the Daily Mail*
Thank’ee, kind master.
*tugs forelock and goes out to buy guillotine*
Guillotine, eh? Good to see your sort know the correct way of preparing a fine cigar, at least. Although personally I prefer to use a knife - guillotines tend to pinch the tip too much, which can disrupt the smooth flow of the smoke and destroy the flavour. Presumably you know to use non-safety matches to light the things, not those proletarian “lighter” things that seem to be all the rage these days?
(Oh, and to people even more pedantinc than me, yes I know that baronets are not - correctly - “of” anywhere, but some have been known to adopt such a form. Though not strictly to be countenanced, I think we can probably forgive them - especially as baronetcies were created by James I purely to make money, so any family that holds one must count as nouveaux riche and a little bit vulgar. Other than the nouveaux riche bit, it fits our dear Mr McKeating down to a tee…)
Yeah? Well, you live in a hice, control you computer with a mice and your favourite film is Ricetabite.
There’s been some confusion in Elect the Lords Towers between Baronets and Barons, so anyone who applies to for a Baronetcy will get a free upgrade!
“Oh, and to people even more pedantinc than me…”
Damn, you beat me to it.
I’m afraid that you’d just be boring old “Sir Chicken Yoghurt, Bt.”, and furthermore as a virtual baronet, you won’t even get to sit in the virtual House of Lords.
And as, Nosemonkey, for this disgraceful libel about Baronets being “Nouveaux Riche”: Burke assures us that the first Baronets were “among the best descended gentlemen in the Kingdom”.
Now where did I leave my snuff…
…movies
Oh, Larry. You don’t know how tempted I was to delay moderating that last comment and posting a spoiler, you scamp.
Ya cheapskate.
I’m going to be the 1st Earl of the North Circular.
And if we are being pedantic, wouldn’t it be Sir Justin of Yoghurt, Bt.?
Sir Justin McKeating, Bt. - the “Bt.” being, of course, an indication of no inherent worth, unlike proper Knights of the Realm who have (at least technically) earned their honour, so rather appropriate really.
Still, if you’re going to get an hereditary title you’ve really got to be at least a Baron, and it has to be Viscount upwards to be worthy of any respect or deference in my books.
There’s still a copy of Debrett’s Review lying around the office, after I nobly pinched it from Lord Lipsey. It contains terribly useful information like a history of Champagne, where to stay in Zanzibar and St Moritz and a list of the next 25 people in line for the throne.
I’ll start the bidding at two pints.
I bet Nosemonkey could tell you most of that kind of stuff off the top of his head, the posh get. Where to buy Laudanum in Marrakesh and suchlike.
I’ll have some of that Debrett’s action - I’d love a copy. Two and a half pints.
Wise man, sir. It truly is a wonder. Quite how else one keeps up with what’s been happening in the polo, I just don’t know. And for anyone planning to pop along to Venice at any point, the information is invaluable.
Do I hear three?
Of course, if Prince Charles continues to cause trouble by expressing opinions and the like, I may have to start memorising a whole new line of succession. The 14th in line under that route is a bit of a honey - wouldn’t mind having her.
As Queen, obviously.
I think you hit the 4 key instead of the 5 key there, mate.
Isn’t it great that people care enough about this rubbish to set up a website about it.
Personally, I’m glad that the bead-jiggling Jacobites were trounced but it’s fun to read about people who still think that old Frankie is the real King.