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Were you there in 1997? Andrew Rawnsley recorded the scene for the ages. We should have been counting the spoons from minute one:

[Alastair] Campbells’s dilligent deputy, Tim Allan, had slipped into Number 10 a few days before the election to choreograph the coronation of the new Prime Minister. He and his wife were greeted by a crowd of exultant citizens, photogenic young children particularly prominent, cheering ‘Tonee!’ and being gladhanded in return. The superficiality of this contrived spectacle was instantly obvious. They waved identical plastic Union Jacks. The original idea – which was for them to wave Labour party banners – had been resisted by officials at Number 10. They wore uniform t-shirts emblazoned ‘Britain Just Got Better’. Blair’s pageant was composed of party workers from Millbank.

And so Tony reaches his decimation. An anniversary reached by the simple expediency of choosing just about the only profession where his actions and personality aren’t punished with a P45, penury or a savage beating. Well done. What’s left to say other than unspeakable abuse? You need a new language for it.