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Being both physically too weak and mentally too apathetic in the last few day to escape it, I’ve found myself taking another spin on the witless, churning carousel of popular culture that is daytime television.

And, like last time, I’ve been inexorably drawn to the music channels. For instance, I’m fascinated by that clash of the cultural titans that is ‘Ayo Technology’ by 50 Cent and Justin Timberlake and which is being endlessly looped at the minute:

Apart from the video being some kind of stalker or sexual harasser’s instruction manual, it was this lyric that caught my ear:

I’m tired of using technology, why don’t you sit down on top of me…

Now, I’m jaded and cynical to a singular degree but doesn’t that translate to:

Hello, I’m sick of looking at pictures of mucky ladies on the internet, please help me…

Similarly, I’m gripped by the poetic and emotional shallows plumbed by erstwhile Pussycat Doll Nicole Scherzinger’s Baby Love. Couldn’t they have tried just a little harder? I had to drag myself upstairs to administer the antidote of Northern Sky by Nick Drake.

I know her song isn’t supposed to be a hymn to the ages and isn’t even really aimed at people who like music but I have a three year old with a better grasp of emotion, soul and, yes dammit, diction.

Looking at the video for the song, it seems to be aimed more at people who prefer more furtive and solitary pursuits. I suspect Ms Scherzinger’s management have shares in Kleenex as a financial safety net should her ‘pop’ ‘career’ stumble.