Ginsberg’s Theorem* again

The next time the Prime Minister or attendant flunkies tell you that ID cards are not going to be compulsory, just remember that, yes, they won’t be compulsory if you’re one of the 20% of us who doesn’t want to travel abroad.

And they won’t be compulsory if you’re a student who doesn’t need a student loan.

The document says: “We should issue ID cards to young people to assist them as they open their first bank account, take out a student loan, etc.”

You have to admit it’s brilliant. ‘We’re not forcing you to have one,’ said the minister, ‘just forget about that holiday or degree’.

What they should do is say that none of us will be permitted to breathe without an ID card. ‘Well, there’s certainly no element of compulsion,’ the Prime Minister’s spokesman will say, ‘but we find that ID cards would help in the provision of respiratory services’.

* Which is:
1. You can’t win.
2. You can’t break even.
3. You can’t even quit the game.


Posted on January 25th, 2008 at 1:37 am

See also

The Observer: Rebels ready to face prison over ID cards
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1 Comment

  1. Anonyscouse on 25.01.2008 at 02:17 Permalink | Reply

    You also wont be able to get benefits or access to services:
    Eg,
    1) Maternity beneft. So you can’t have kids without an ID card.
    2) Child benefit. Ditto
    3) Child Tax Credits. Ditto.
    4) Statutory Sick Pay/ Incapacity Benefit. Don’t think of getting too ill to work, cos you’ll need an ID card.
    5) But that’s ok, because you won’t be able to register with a doctor or access NHS without one anyway.
    6) Disability benefits. No being born with a disability or having an accident/illness that leaves you disabled.
    7) Fuck universal voting. No card, no vote.

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