Shyness, as a great man once said, is nice. However, shyness can stop you from doing all the things in life you’d like to.

Take the Home Secretary, previously something of a wallflower, for instance. According to state-funded gossip-monger Nick Robinson, Jacqui Smith put in a stunning performance at the National (security) Theatre - in her play 42 Days - last night that was acclaimed by everyone who saw it:

Shares in Smith soared last night. As Labour MP’s and peers poured out of the Parliamentary Labour Party meeting all were agreed that Jacqui the home secretary had put in the performance of her life. Some went further and claimed that this was the best ministerial performance in the past year or two.

Jacqui got talent! An gushing account like that makes even this bitter cynic want to hurl roses in Smith’s direction. The question must be asked, however: who would have thought it? This is a Smith previously unheard and unseen by the public. Persuasiveness? Passion? Where the hell did they come from?

Previously of the talentless, plodding, deeply unimpressive, vague, and the imperiously ‘because I said so’ and ‘will this do?’ school of politics, it seems Jacqui is blossoming. Why has she not displayed it before? Why has this talent, this amazing performing ability, been kept from her public all these years? She usually phones in her performance, as they say, and now she pulls it out of the bag.

We always thought she was a Keira Knightley when it turns out she’s a Katherine Hepburn. Yesterday she was simply maaarvellous daahling! It must be true - it’s all in Nick Robinson’s account of a private meeting he wasn’t at relayed to him by members of parliament not-at-all-worried about their job prospects and expenses.

So, don’t keep it behind closed doors, Jacqui. Let the paying public have a gander. New Labour want to make the arts more accessible and here’s an ideal opportunity. Don’t be shy, Home Secretary. Make us believe. If there’s something you’d like to try, ask me I wont say no, how could I?

UPDATE: A theatre critic writes…

‘Ms Smith’s attempt this morning to publicly repeat her reportedly bravura private performance of last night was bound to be something of a disappointment. A clearly tired and lacklustre Ms Smith failed to reproduce the moving and inspirational act that was reported in such glowing terms by the BBC’s Nick Robinson and members of the Parliamentary Labour Party.

‘Indeed, with her public appearances continuing to be drowned out by the boos of her harsher critics, it remains to be seen if Ms Smith’s private performance for her fans was a one-off or hyped by over-emotional lovers of political theatre.’