The Sun: the cream of British journalism
This is one of the funniest things I’ve read in ages. It’s just awesome…
The genesis of a “Sun versus the Tories” by-election was a 40th birthday party thrown for Rebekah Wade, the tabloid’s editor, on Thursday night. The Sun, the principal media cheerleader for Gordon Brown’s contentious 42-days detention proposals, was outraged by David Davis’s resignation. A characteristically unrestrained leader in the tabloid yesterday, headlined “Crazy Davis”, fulminated against the former shadow home secretary’s “shabby act of treachery” and “petty grandstanding”.
Ms Wade and her team had on Thursday afternoon already been discussing a cunning plan to convert this print attack into a full-blown campaign battle, by approaching Rachel North, one of the survivors of the July 7 bombings, to stand against Mr Davis.
Rachel North?
Now, I’m sure those at the Sun are under the greatest of pressure. Editor Rebekah Wade has to take orders from the singularly ruthless Rupert Murdoch after all. And those taking orders from Wade must be aware of her temper and what can happen when things go wrong.
So, with that in mind, how the hell did they come up with the monumentally wrong-headed idea that Rachel North would be an ideal pro-42 day candidate to go up against David Davis?
Did they not have ten minutes to peruse her blog?
Has not one of them caught her during her many television and radio appearances?
What about her appearance in the movie Taking Liberties?
Or her appearance before the Home Affairs Committee.
Or her article in a RUPERT BLOODY MURDOCH NEWSPAPER where she said…
I told the committee that I was against extending the 28-day detention period. No evidence had been put forward to show that it was necessary and while the police and security services said they thought it might be useful in future, I did not think that was sufficient grounds for shredding habeas corpus.
Rachel’s been one of the most vociferous and articulate (not to mention prominent) defenders of civil liberties in this country in the last few years. It’s hard to think of a worse suggestion for a candidate to go up against David Davis. My three year-old daughter’s free, I suppose.
Posted on June 14th, 2008 at 8:47 pm
You’ve heard the latest? The Adam Boulton blog on Sky is suggesting John “we’ll set aboot ye” Smeaton as a possible candidate.
I was “pleased” in checking the Akehurst requirements to find I ticked some of his boxes (having siblings and a granny at Lockerbie on the night of the disaster, and attended the town in the immediate aftermath) but as we’re all against the general tenor of government policy in the area I had guessed that we wpuldn’t be being asked either. But I’ll tell my granny to keep her answerphone on just in case Uncle Rupert leaves a message.
Scott’s latest blog post… More on the Akehurst thing
I don’t know why they don’t go the whole hog and ask one of the Chuckle Brothers. The way this is beginning to look I don’t think having Paul or Barry on the ticket would be any more demeaning, frankly.
Now I come to think of it, my Dad was at the Lockerbie crash site the night it happened, directing traffic as a member of the fourth emergency service (that’ll be the AA) because the cops were so busy counting dead people. He saw the crater the plane made - Maybe we could draft my Dad in for the Labour party?
I haven’t asked him, but he might well fancy parleying the worst night of his life into a slight political bump for Gordon Brown.
Flying Rodent’s latest blog post… From There To Here - A Guide To Self-Loathing In Three Easy Steps
Words fail me…
DaveHill’s latest blog post… "A Goodly Hoard" (Part 2)
I was in Manchester when the IRA bomb went off … but it’s not really them local white turrirsts that Akehurst/the Sun have in mind, is it?
kate’s latest blog post… O rly?
Seriously, though, I hope John Smeaton sticks to his baggage handling and doesn’t become a face saver for the government. He’s too good for them.
It used to be blokes with lines of WWII medals on their chests that would be taken up as MPs (according to the docudrama Margaret Thatcher: The Long Walk to Finchley). A few burns on the face are a better bet now.
Makeover show:- How to look like a by-election winner. You can do a build up with thick foundation coloured with a little blusher. Lay it in streaks from corner of eye to lip.
For the candidate who really wants to be unanswerable you might want to consider cosmetic surgery. A limb amputation would pretty much clinch it - but that is expensive and not available on the NHS.
Prediction: The Sun won’t run a candidate - it exposes them to the kind of accountability Murdoch doesn’t like (or need, given his death-grip on New Labour)