When Gordon Brown went to bow and scrape before some of the world’s most murderous theocrats last week, he took ‘27 leading business figures‘ with him. We can’t be sure who all the companies were but I think we can safely assume swimsuit and pet food manufacturers weren’t invited.

One company who was invited however was - surprise, surprise - arms dealer BAE systems. Because nothing signals the beginning of a new era of financial accountability and openness that Gordon Brown has called for than touring countries with human rights record to make Satan puke with a merchant of death mired in allegations of corruption.

And all for a reputed 500 million quid’s worth of business deals for British businesses. That’s a whopping 1.35 per cent of the £37 billion the government are pouring into the banks.

That’s not the end of the good news, as business secretary Peter Mandelson said:

“If you really want to know my true opinion, the amount of goodwill that has been generated by this will far, far exceed the value of the immediate agreements.”

The goodwill of floggers and beheaders is a great resource as we all know. Much better than cash. You can mash it up to make a nutritious broth, lag your loft with it, and it makes an excellent substitute for natural gas.

Yes, everything’s going to be all right.